LOVE SERIES: Are there any good men or women in Ghana? Part 1

good men - theonlywayisghana

Hi guys, it has been a while since my last series on my love life in Ghana.

Did you have it all figured out, that by the age of 25 you would be lisa from coming to Americamarried and possibly celebrating the birth of your first bundle of joy by age 26? Is it your reality today?

Unfortunately life doesn’t always turn out like that does it? The worst thing about this is that you actually have people believing that there something wrong with you.

Fare enough, ‘you cannot have smoke without fire’ so there must be something that we each have to stop and reflect on, to try and determine why someone in their 30’s is still single. Many women and men are single today because apparently there are not any good men or women to choose from. Would you agree with that argument? I think, at one point I did but now my views have changed.

I thought about this the other day and I came to the conclusion that it is not a case of there are not any “good men” or women for that matter but many lack the maturity when it comes to serious relationship building. If you think about it, I take myself to be a “good woman” and I am not the exception, there are many other good women that I personally know. So if we are termed as “good women” equally there must be some “good men” out there. We shouldn’t believe the lie that is being sold to us which we live in without fully investigating.

I totally believe that there are some men who need to grow up and take the responsibility to develop their skills and abilities as - theonlywayisghana

We can no longer live in a superficial world where we think that the person we meet must be perfect. We are flawed human beings, some of us are coming from a terrible past and sometimes you just need one person who will see passed your flaws and accept you for who you are. Unfortunately, many people go into relationships with selfish motives and what good that may have resided in the other person slowly seeps out.

I think I can safely say that most of us in this world just need someone to come and rescue us from ourselves. I’m not talking of a saviour here. Our outlook on one another must change so that we see passed the superficial stuff that society, TV and media push our way. Sometimes we have to ask ourselves…Is it that they were not good for you or is it that you were not good for them?

open heart - theonlywayisghanaI think sometimes “generational tendencies” follow us without us even knowing. In other words, the mistakes our parents may have made become our own because it is as if they opened a door and forgot to close it. So when we go into the arena of adulthood we in turn start going through some of the experiences they encountered.

Sometimes it has nothing to do with “generational tendencies” but everything to do with us and our immaturity or refusal to grow up when it comes to being in a relationship. Many of us are single because of our lack of understanding about the realities of being in a relationship. Our beliefs about what makes a relationship shapes how we enter one or not enter one. Going into a relationship with the wrong motives can quickly dissolve what could have been a lasting relationship.


The ideologies that we have about relationships can either help us to make the right decisions or wrong decisions when choosing a partner. One thing is for sure, we need to start seeing each other as more than what we have been feed over the years.

See you same time next week for part 2.

Connect Bertha - the only way is ghana contributorwith me on:
Facebook: Bertha Wensah
Twitter: @BWensah
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